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love2kissu
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Name: Jennifer
Country: United States
State: Ohio
Birthday: 5/24/1984
Gender: Female
Interests: spending to much on the internet and the phone, looking for the one, hoping he's out there.
Expertise: I've really started wondering
Occupation: Unemployed/Between Jobs
Industry: Other
Message: message meEmail: email me
Member Since:
6/9/2003
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| Can you believe this...Is it fate or what?? |
4/9/2004 |
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Well disregaurd the last entry it's really not pertinent. Juan Crane,the first boy I ever dated and also the first I ever kissed. That happened to be 7 years ago in 7th grade actually, that was also 1 marriage 1 baby and one divorce ago for me and the same for him except he had two in these 7 yrs we were apart. Well 1 wek ago he shows up at my job and basically asks if I remember him (of course he was my first "love") so we started talking and he asked if I remembered how I told him to get a job and get his life strait before we could be together. Yeah, I remembered but that was 3 years ago and I hadn't seen him since not even once I'd never even heard his name in a passing conversation. So seeing him and hearing this stuff after all this time really took me by surprise. Then he asks if the offer still stands because now he has his life in order and a job and all that stuff and he says he never forgot me and had always loved me. SO we decided to get back together. He left his girlfriend of 5 years just because I said I wanted to be with him. i can't believe it. I don't know how this happened or why but I think someone is trying to tell me something. We are going to get an apartment together on Tuesday and begin a life together. Doesn't it sound like some fairy tale running into your first love after so many years? Our lives have taken so many turns yet somehow we were thrown onto the same path! I am happy excited and nervous, I just have no idea what to think I just hope it works!!
My friend of 12 years won't talk to me and i have no clue why she says she doesn't want to deal with my issues even though I don't know what she's talking about she refuses to speak to me. Not even to tell her that the reason I haven't called is because I have been working a lot and my long distance got shut off. I used to call her every day but I have no way of it now excpet when she's at her g-ma's on the weekends and I am usually working today I had time to call so I did and she won't talk to me????
Well tell me what you think I have to get ready and go to work! | | | |
| Well my life has really taken quite a few turns these last few months I have really been through a lot and I am finally getting somewhere I think I like being. I have really slacked down on the drinking tremendously I mean and that is a huge step in the right direction and a very hard thing for me to do. i have a huge problem and I may never be able to control drinking the way I should but I am trying. I called about a few apts yesterday found a few that "might be open" that are in my price range. Cross your fingers for me. Me and Jeremiah are getting along great these days even though life is so incredicly hard for us I think he is the only think that keeps me strong these days. I am getting ready to go to work in a few minutes. I love working it's an easy job and I am getting good hours. I definetely need that. He has brought up marriage a lot over the past few days and I can't believe I am actually considering it but if i ever get married again it would definetely be a to a guy like him. I mean we are exactly the same people we have the same humor the same temperment. I help him see the good in things and he shows me the world isn't a bed of roses I definetely need that reality check sometimes. Life is picking up for us and I am glad because we were really down in the dumps there for a while. I love him and he is for the sure the only good thing going in my life right now and the only reason I am trying so hard. He doesn't let me give up and he is really the strength I need these days. I could talk for hours about the way I feel about him and the things we do and be say but you'd never get it it's just some spectacular bond no one truely understands and besides that's between us!! So now I guess I am going to end this I have to be at work in 40 min I am leaving in 20. I'll go check out a few diaries and be on my way. Actually I need to change my diary description.
Peace | | |
| Jesus fucking Christ where do I even start? Well Jeremiah wants me to write in my diary so here goes I guess it's been like 2 and a half maonths since I wrote last. I lost the baby, but no "ahhs" or "I'm sorry's" now I don't have that to worry about as fucked up as that sounds. Relationsips have came and gone and failed and I thought for awhile I was gonna have a good one but then that wouldn't work with me would it? Then I went on a "drunk" yeah one of the famous ones and have to many stories of that for me to even begin to tell or try to remember (which we all know how good at that I am anyways, right?) Well me and Rat started talking again for about a minute (maybe less) and I started hanging out up there and met Jeremiah and we started hanging out and we started going out and then I went on a really long drunk but we did it together (ya know I finally found one who can hang) we were pretending to try to get our shit together but we really were't we were just having a good time and we liked it that way, we didn't really have much to worry about and then somewhere in the middle of all that BAM reality hit us in the face and we realized we had to do something with our lives and so we really went out and tried to figure out what the hell two grown people should be doing and so now I have a job and we are looking for a place and not drinking our lives away and maybe things are finally on track. But it's hard really fucking hard and it seems every time we get up something knocks us back down and that's just shitty. So I am working and setting here at the library getting ready to go to the house we are currently "residing" in and maybe I'll have a beer buyt I am tired and just need to relax and then off again tomorrow for a rerun of today.
By the way friend if you happen to catch a glance at this: "I ain't mad at ya" | | |
| I have dedicated this song to Eddie it reminds me of him for some reason. I like it!
She turned up her nose as she walked by my Cadillac
From the corner of my eye I saw you and you laughed
You were sittin' on the swing on your front porch
Paintn' your nails like you were bored
And you yelled she was sure impressed with you
Chorus
Well I ain't first class
But I ain't white trash
I'm wild and a little crazy too
Some girls don't like boys like me
Aw but some girls do
I yelled and asked if you would like a ride
When we pulled out of your yard I bald a tire
You was laughing at me, I was doing James Dean
You was the prettiest girl I'd ever seen
When you rolled your eyes and twirled my pink fur dice
Chorus
Well good ole' boys don't get no breaks
And rich boys think they got what it takes
But theres' someone for each of us they say
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| Awwwwwwwwww Eddie. he's great he really is, we get along great. I mean he is just what I have beeen looking for!! I just know, sometimes you just do and it feels so right and that feels so good. I can't wait to see him!! He's so interesting and we talk and talk and talk and its great it really is. I think he likes me pretty well too! He's so cool, he really is, how many times have I said that now? Oh well it deserves to be said. I am happy and we really enjoy talking to each other and I am excited because I can see this going really good places. He is the guy I have been looking for for who knows how long, he's great he likes talking to me he likes giving me attention and I love getting it. I think he likes me complimenting him and I'd love to do it more but I'm trying not to come on to strong though that doesn't seem to be a problem, I think its gonna work out really nicely. I could really talk about him for ever but this seems like soemthing i wanna keep in my heart now, it doesn't feel right writing it down.... I don't know it sounds silly but oh well that's what I am in a way I guess, a silly romantic foolbut isn't it great when someone returns your feelings?? I'm not lonely any more!!! Goodnight all | | |
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